I was talking to my mum when I said “I had no confidence when I was young.”
She then said “That’s normal.” For her, confidence is what you CAN do and how WELL you can do. But to me, when I said to my mum that I used to have no confidence, I meant that I didn’t believe myself. I think, for many people, confidence is something what my mum perceives. And it used to be that way to me. At one point in my life, I misunderstood that “I had no value.” So I began “making effort” to “earn” a reputation, a prize, a title, a score….etc. Studying hard, taking exams to be qualified, having eye lush extension etc…. But I was never, ever, satisfied. Even if everyone praised, even if I got the top prize or grade, I never felt enough. Don’t get me wrong though, studying hard towards prize or grade, getting beauty treatments are all good. What wasn’t right about the way I was doing what I was doing was, I was doing all these activities with the belief that “I wasn’t enough.” I was doing everything in order to EARN something that I believed that was missing. Because there’s nothing that was missing, as everything was within myself, I could never ever satisfied with all the things I was doing! I only found out why after I came across with energy work. And that’s how I got in touch with my inner child. I had to allow my inner child to speak to me. |
Ray of Sunshine by KaekoAll articles are my personal point of views. Archives
February 2022
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